Renovations Starting Soon, and Job Stress

Isn't that an enticing title? Ugh.

Things are about to start happening quickly with the new apartment. The contractor came by last night to pick up keys and a check. Tomorrow, Wednesday, he and the demolition guy will start removing the kitchen cabinets and floor. The closet and bathroom doors will go as well. And Friday the kitchen cabinets, new refrigerator, and all the tiles (for both bathrooms and kitchen) will be delivered. As soon as the base cabinets are assembled (we are doing Ikea cabinets so everything has to be put together), the floor will be installed and the base cabinets so the counter template can be made next week. It takes at least two weeks for the counter to be cut to order, possibly longer since it will be done over the holidays, so that has to happen right away.

Things are moving more slowly upstairs with my current apartment. I live in a big co-op building and unfortunately our slow moving management company still hasn't finished the building's financial statements for 2016... as we near the end of 2017. Unbelievable. Understandably, the buyer's attorney wants to see those statements before his clients sign a contract. But it's now been close to three weeks since I verbally accepted their offer (on Thanksgiving Day) and I'm starting to get a little anxious. Luckily they agreed yesterday to put their deposit into escrow even before seeing the financials. And our building manager thinks the financial documents will be ready in a week or less. As soon as they review those documents, they will sign the contract and send it over to me. Once I sign it, they still have to get their financing in place and also do an application for the co-op board. Reviewing that application by the board can easily take a month and I assume they won't start until the financing is in place, though I'm not sure about that part. So the three month clock for all this hasn't even started yet. It's amazing that we can stay in my current apartment while the new one is being renovated but I'd rather not own two apartments for too long. Still, I'm mostly reassured that things are very likely to work out just fine.

Work is less promising. Supposedly "people" are pursuing funding to make up for our massive budget cuts from the state. That has to be figured out by the end of the year. I am still getting my paycheck -- I guess I should be grateful for that! -- but they haven't paid into our union pension fund in many years. Our funding right now is only for the year -- typically we get funding from the state in five year cycles. For some reason this cycle the state decided to take two thirds of our funding and give it to upstate New York to start new clinics there. While I applaud the expansion of school based clinics everywhere, stealing from Peter to pay Paul seems asinine. And so we limp along. Without any supplies so far, though supposedly they are coming... soon.

What is especially frustrating to me that some of our clinics -- mine and my colleague Anna's -- are very productive. We see a lot of patients. We diligently collect insurance information -- my assistant is constantly sending requests home for updated insurance informaton. We work HARD. And then our other two sites... One sees about 25% as many patients as I do. The other sees more patients... but only as first aid visits, none as billable visits. I think her feeling is that her patient families won't agree to share insurance information. I think this is bullshit. I think some of her families don't want to and so she shrugs and gives up without explaining that this is not a free program -- we rely on reimbursement from insurance companies in order to fund a program that provides health care, free of charge (to patients) for all children, regardless of insurance and immigration status.

Needless to say, this is infuriating. And we aren't, it seems, allowed to talk about it. And my colleagues are just accepted as is. They won't lay them off because they feel, it seems, it's not their faults. Again, bullshit. I work hard because I choose to. They could make the same choice. They could petition the school and the PTA to help educate parents about why they need insurance cards from families. But it's work. And it's easier not to do work.

Oh, and my vaccine refrigerator keeps malfunctioning. Despite being brand new. And each time I lose thousands of dollars in vaccines. That our program will be billed for. (My colleague who only does first aid visits hasn't given a single vaccine in YEARS. I give hundreds each year. But zero at the moment... despite a list of children who don't receive mandatory vaccines immediately.)

So I'm walking around with low level anxiety all the time. It never leaves me lately. I thought explaining all that might make me feel better. Unloading it.

And then there's our current political climate which just feels unbearable.

It's enough to make a person wonder if she has an anxiety disorder.