Thirty Weeks

Up eleven pounds. Belly measuring 32 weeks.

This past week was HARD.

Friday night I got depressed, thinking how could I possibly be sick for ten or even twelve more weeks? It was just unthinkable.

I was struggling with what felt like yet another stomach bug, my fifth since the week before Thanksgiving. And terrible reflux. Monday I came to work 90 minutes late. I called in sick Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday I came to work but had to take a break to lie down. And Friday, I worked for two hours and then went to the ER. Because on top of my GI symptoms, I was dizzy and occasionally short of breath.

Luckily my midwife was able to be with me at the hospital. Apart from my urine showing dehydration, all the tests came back normal. Well, I was still anemic.

So I got some IV fluids and felt a bit better and went home. I think with my stomach hurting so frequently, it's hard to eat or drink, and then I was having diarrhea, which meant I was losing more fluids. I felt like I had drunk a ton before I went to the ER but apparently not enough.

Saturday was another day of feeling bad. Just tons of stomach cramps.

But Sunday, hallelujah, I felt better! I actually slept in my own bed! Not propped up on the couch! And Monday was good, too. I mean, both days I had much less energy than I'm used to. And I barely left the apartment, which is exceedingly rare for me. But I organized Calliope's room -- which was strangely exhausting -- with her new bed and new shelves. So that was satisfying.

Unfortunately, I didn't eat smart on Monday night. My midwife had recently made an offhand comment about, "at some point you need to be able to eat some vegetables." And I was home for the day, so I made big trays of roasted cauliflower and roasted brussel sprouts. And I had generous servings of each, as least by my new standards of not being able to eat much. And, oh Nellie! What a terrible night I had. Searingly painful reflux despite trying every kind of medication under the sun. Eventually I had to take Zofran.

Tuesday was spent in recovery mode at work. Not able to eat much again. And today, Wednesday, I feel more distended than ever and like I am eating less. Sigh.

But at least I don't feel sick like I did last week. It's more reflex and distention making me feel sick now, as opposed to cramps and shortness of breath. So I guess I should be grateful.

I'm taking medications by the fistful, which feels very strange since I rarely take medicine when I'm not pregnant. And of course one hopes to avoid taking medication at all while pregnant. And I had acupuncture today and will go to the chiropractor on Friday, in hopes that both will help my reflux symptoms. Or whatever else ails me.

My midwife is sending me for a EKG, to make sure my heart isn't making me dizzy. I'm confident it's not, but I'm willing to get the test done if it isn't too inconvenient. And I'm supposed to get a stool analysis, to make sure I'm not carrying around a gut infection. The logistics of this, though, are leaving me stymied. I won't say more about that.

Mostly, I'm just tired of thinking about my digestion all the blessed time. And feeling bad every time I eat.

And now, it's time to rest at my desk... feeling sick once again.

Wearing a sundress, pulled down to her waist to make it into a "down skirt" -- she's obssessed
with skirts that come down to her ankles, strangely hard to find for the three year old crowd.
And all bundled up... except for a winter coat, which she refused.
Our compromise: she's cheerfully carrying it in a backpack on her back.