Feeling a Bit Better

Thank you for all the lovely support. It was hugely gratifying and comforting to receive. It made me feel loved and supported.

I'm feeling a bit better today. Like I've moved past the worst of the crisis.

My nanny share partner also feels like I don't need to feel quite so guilty and responsible. That both me and the nanny made mistakes in judgement, it appears. We both agree that I have more life experience, so perhaps it's more my fault, but not 100%.

And she also pointed out that one way or another, Nastya will be okay. She will have a place to live.

Nastya said today that she and her new husband may move in with his parents in Staten Island.

Amy raised the interesting point... what were they planning to do before my apartment popped up?

Surely nothing about me and this situation is forcing them to move in with his parents.

So that made me feel better.

She also doesn't think that Nastya will quit because of this. She thinks that it's not so easy for nannies to get jobs these days.

I don't know if that's true or not but it's a relief that she thinks so. Especially because I was also feeling guilty for putting Amy in the middle of this... that she, too, would lose her nanny if worst came to worst.

But Amy seems unconcerned, so I am drawing comfort in that.

In unrelated but cheering news, Calliope is suddenly standing several seconds on her own, unsupported. Occasionally without her realizing it. Exciting!

She also suddenly feels heavy. A lot more so.

I got out her twelve month clothes today. Her pants are still too big but not so big that they won't stay on. Yay! Any day now her six month onesies will be retired. Thank god. I'm so sick of looking at them.